Merryn: Many don't realize that there are 42 million survivors in America of child sexual abuse. Erin Merryn is a powerful speaker and advocate for countless, faceless children and adults in our country who have similarly suffered sexual abuse. February 7, 2023 by Cindy Erin Merryn is a Global Advocate for Child Sex Abuse Prevention For years, Erin Merryn was too scared to speak up about sexual abuse. The parents can then share the information that the schools provided with anyone else in their household. She was taught how to ride out a tornado, instructed in the eight steps for turning down illegal drugs, and told how to react to a friendly stranger who might try to abduct her. Acting out both at home and in school, she was given an IEP (Individual Education Plan) and was told she was just going through a phase; that her parents brief separation was the probable root cause. Partly cloudy. "The new bill brings a mandate," Merryn said, "mandating that all (Illinois) schools--pre-school through 12th grade--must begin next fall teaching sexual-abuse prevention education in the schools." And it was at her house the very first overnight that I woke up to her uncle who lived in the home sexually abusing me, said Merryn. As the abuse continued, and as she was forced to see her abuser over and over again in social situations, she struggled with . 46 reviews. Unfortunately for many survivors they never see their perpetrators held accountable. It allowed me to let go of the bitterness, anger and rage I had toward him and find the freedom and peace I longed for and the ability to turn this painful event into something positive. Silence Broken and Stigmas Shattered -- Help for Incest Survivors Is Here Fans of Erin Merryn's heart-wrenching debut memoir Stolen Innocence were left wondering at the end what would become of an emotionally fragile Erin after her confrontation with the reality of being a child of incest and molestation. So many children will be protected because of her." So before CAC's a child brought to a police station could be filled with anxiety and fear that they are in trouble. In 2013, Governor Quinn signed it into law requiring Illinois schools to teach it every single year. Those were just the number of children who broke their silence that year. But instead of telling everyone to vote against it, she told everyone to vote in support of this bill. In a Q&A with Alaska Dispatch before boarding her flight north, Merryn wasn't shy about sharing the difficulties she's experienced, including a suicide attempt, or the one thing that happened to make her finally tell someone she was being hurt. And for the next year and a half, repeatedly told me, This is our little secret. She urged kids to come forward if they or someone they know is being sexually abused. Confronting him empowered me and eventually allowed me to forgive him when he wrote a letter apologizing. Merryn: I have witnessed some lawmakers come in voting against the bill who got on their mic after hearing me testify and (told) me they had all planned to vote against this bill and that my testimony changed their mind. He doesnt sleep out ever. She knew exactly what she was doing by asking simple questions on my life, friends, what I did for fun, and my family. Merryn said she was never taught to speak up about it, so shekept it a secret. Erin Elizabeth was sexually abused from 11-13 by her older cousin. It ended only after a chance conversation between Merryn and one of her sisters, who blurted out one day that their cousin Brian was "gross." Merryn (whose other books are Stolen Innocence and Living for Today), the mother of a toddler girl, says this is a conversation parents must have every year and often. Her name is Erin Merryn and she is the founder of Erins Law. After reading that letter, a switch flipped inside Erin. Alaska Dispatch: What can someone reading about this do in their own life, or change about their own perspective, to make coming forward easier for victims? I feel it would have given me the voice that these men took from me. After describing the difference between the truth and a lie I was asked if I agreed to tell the truth that day. Sexually abused as a. Therapists (and) an amazing school psychologist in high school really helped me heal. A safe touch could be a high five or hug and an unsafe touch is someone touching you in the areas covered by your swimsuit, or your private parts, Merryn said. My sister and I were the only girls that he was around all the time. Statistics show that one in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused by the age of 18. Merryn said she testified four times for the task force. Meanwhile, the survivor who came up with the idea aftersufferingher own personal horrors shared her story with senators Tuesday. According to the Office of the Monmouth County Prosecutors website, the only time that Megans Law information will be released to parents or families of students is if the school receives a Tier III high risk notice concerning an offender living within a 1,000-foot radius of their location. You've grown into a powerful voice who is bearing witness to the nation. Soon it was no longer our secret and I was behind a different closed door not the one to a bedroom, a bathroom, basement, or closet but this time into a colorful room with a small table and bright light shinning through the skylight. Merryn worked with U.S. Vermont State Board of Education has required it in schools since 2009. It is currently passed in 37 states as of January 2021. Says Merryn: "[Ashley] made me pinky promise not to say anything. The abuse went on for years. From the age of 11 to 13, I was repeatedly sexually abused at the hands of a family member, an older cousin, she said. But only 1 in every 10 sexually abused children ever tell anyone about it. Putting the lives of children in danger and possibly taking their innocence is worth it? CBS News' Reena Ninan visited a public school in Illinois to see how the school teaches kids about safe . He'd conditioned and kept me silent for two years, so he knew he could get away with that behavior, even with so many people around. I can remember that as if it happened yesterday. Under Erins Law, the New Jersey Commissioner of Education must provide school districts with age-appropriate sample learning activities and resources designed to implement this requirement. On this Wikipedia the language links are at the top of the page across from the article title. She began to think about all the other prevention classes and drills she learned in school: how to say no to drugs, what to do in case of a fire, what to do in case of a tornado, how to never answer the door if parents arent home. In her diary Erin Merryn reveals how her life was transformed one night when, as an eleven-year-old, she was sexually abused in her grandparents condo by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. Alaska Dispatch: In your quest to get Erin's Law passed in every state, you must have encountered some surprising remarks. The next day they told their parents. Chris Newlin - National Children's Advocacy Center Merryn: My resilience took a lot of psychological help growing up as a kid, teen, and young adult. Caught you off guard? Merryn saidif parents are not comfortable, the bill allows parents toopt their kids out of the education. You will eventually hear about this law being passed in all 50 states, and I plan on one day taking it and making it international, said Erin. Merryn travels the country advocating for children who are victims of sexual assault. tax-exempt 501(c)(4) non-profit organization. CAC The place Erin Merryn broke her silence The Children's Advocacy Center of Northwest Cook County Illinois In 1998 seventy five thousand six hundred and forty seven abused children were seen in one hundred and thirty nine Children's Advocacy Centers in America. Eleven states have passed the legislation. Merryn found her voice at 13 when her younger sister said the words she'll never forget: "Brian's gross!" It turned out cousin Brian was abusing Merryn's little sister, too. It was the first time she supported a school mandate, and she retired later that year. She has appeared on Oprah, Today Show, Good Morning America, CNN, Fox, MSNBC, TLC documentary Breaking the Silence, CBS This Morning, Katie Couric, Tamaron Hall, 700 Club, and over 200 local media stations. I will fight alongside Erin and the advocates right here in our community until the day that this lifesaving legislation finally becomes law.. She started by pulling out that little pink diary. There is a misconception about this issue many people think sexual abuse only happens to the poor, to people who come from broken homes, etc. [3] According to her personal account, she told her parents about the latter after her sister confided that she had also been abused by the same relative. After years as a teen struggling with nightmares and flashbacks of my abuse, attempting suicide, self-injury, etc., I decided to use that voice to confront my abuser For seven months we corresponded in letters. By speaking up even when family is against the idea, it is freedom for a survivor and allows them to reclaim a piece of their lives back. Merryn said the abuse only stopped because her family moved away. Winds NW at 5 to 10 mph. It was a detailed account of how an officer came to her school to talk about stranger danger. I also encourage parents to have a code word with their kids, she said. The only education I ever received about sexual abuse was when I became a victim, and the abusers threatened bad things would happen if I ever told. Children are taught that the police are their to keep their communities safe and lock up the bad people. He got us quiet and continued to get away with it. Merryn's family, including her two sisters, moved to another neighborhood in the same town when Merryn was 8, and she stopped seeing Ashley. Merryn advocates for sexual abuse victims. But her nightmare was just beginning. She is the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety on the prevention of child sexual abuse. The more I shared the more I felt heard like I was lifting this burden off me and by the way the forensic interviewer was talking to me and encouraged me she gave me the message she believed me. There are thousands of accused sex offenders every year who are found not guilty living in our communities. I was a senior in high school when I published my first book, my childhood diary where I kept my secrets of abuse with my cousin locked away. "(It) brings me back to remembering being six-years-old being abused. The instruction will be provided by a school nurse who has completed professional development sexual abuse and assault awareness and prevention. House Bill 105 overwhelminglypassed the Ohio Housea year ago. Jill Burke is a former writer and columnist for Alaska Dispatch News. (Read why most child abuse goes unreported). Forgiving him did not mean what he did was right, she stressed. At age 11, Erin fell victim again. I also tell parents don't give childrens private parts pet names. We live in a society that keeps it hushed and (there is) so much taboo around it; people are afraid to speak up and say this happened to them. The look in this mans eyes, the color shirt he was wearing and the last thing he said to me, Dont you dare tell anybody. Erin Merryn (Author) Format: Kindle Edition See all formats and editions Kindle $12.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $16.10 35 Used from $2.70 5 New from $12.50 Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. Erin Merryn was an innocent child of six when her best friend asked her to sleepover. Do you know if it was as healing for him as it was for you? Now I have somebody I love and trust abusing me," Merryn said. She is an activist against child sexual abuse. Merryn is an author and activist against sexual abuse who founded "Erin's Law," which requires school to. At the age of 13, Erin finally got the courage to tell her parents after learning her younger sister was being abused by that same cousin. Thirty-seven states have passed Erins Law and Merryn has tried three times in seven years to get the bill passed in Ohio. Anyone who has felt victimized, ashamed, isolated, and silenced by their abusers will receive a road-map in the book for self-discovery, forgiveness, and empowerment to overcome trauma and live fully and fearlessly for today. She explained to her cousin that she didnt want to publish it out of revenge, rather to help the millions of other sexual assault survivors. A survivor of childhood sexual abuse, Erin has worked diligently to lobby every state to pass Erin's Law, beginning with her home state of Illinois in 2009. However, she said theabuseand rape continueduntil she was almost nine. (Slaven Vlasic/Getty Images) 35. (2016) Consider This Self - Author and Children's Advocate. In April, 2010, Illinois State Senator Tim Bivins agreed to meet with Erin and he became the first state legislator to sponsor Erins Law. Since that first meeting, Erin has met with hundreds of state legislators, testified dozens of times in front of State Senate and House committees, served on several committees to draft bills and implement the new laws, plus speaks regularly to schools, agencies, conferences and media nationwide. The law has now passed in 37 states. Erin Merryn (born February 2, 1985) is the author of Stolen Innocence, Living for Today, An Unimaginable Act, Bailey No Ordinary Cat, and The Diary of a Cat Named Carrot. Alaska Dispatch: Thank you for reminding us that abuse happens across all socioeconomic conditions. Stolen Innocencewas published soon after. If they feel they are in danger or in an uncomfortable situation, they can call home and use the code word, something as simple as, I forgot my math homework at school. . How? Ensuring all New Jersey kids have access to age-appropriate sexual abuse prevention education will end the cycle of abuse before it begins. However, during the hearing Tuesday,Ohio State Sen. Sandra OBrien, R-Ashtabula, told Merryn that whileshe was sorry about what happened to her,there will always be evil in the world.. Look out for motels that might house sex offenders. Erin Merryn, Stolen Innocence: Triumphing Over a Childhood Broken by Abuse: A Memoir 0 likes Like "Brian, this letter is probably coming as a complete surprise to you, but I didn't feel I should warn you since you never warned me when you were going to use my body for own damn pleasures. Merryn: This wasn't bad luck. Erin's Law, which debuted in Illinois, is now in 37 states and mandates that public schools teach age-appropriate sex abuse prevention to grades as young as pre-K. Merryn said those lessons on . Well, something shocking happened. Do you believe one word is more appropriate than the other? Through her personal diary, written during the years of her abuse, Erin shares her journey through pain and confusion to inner strength and, ultimately, forgiveness. But many schools, she said, are using faculty social workers and psychologists because research shows its better taught by in-house staff then outside agencies. The Children's Advocacy Center of Northwest Cook County, Ill. (there are 900 of these centers across America in every state), helped give me the courage in my forensic interview after my sister and I broke our silence to tell what had happened. Her friend slept through the assault, and Merryn remained silent. Her older cousin sexually abused her from 11-13 years old. Buccos bill requires all school districts to incorporate age-appropriate sexual abuse awareness and prevention education in grades preschool through 12 as part of Core Curriculum Content Standards in Comprehensive Health and Physical Education. Pat Quinn on Thursday signed a new law extending sexual abuse education in Illinois schools. After Bailey's passing, she adopted a kitten named Carrot. Erin's Law was the first law passed in the United States requiring sexual abuse prevention education to be taught to students in school every year, and it was subsequently passed in 38 U.S. states before being signed into federal law. "Alabama needs this law because just like everywhere else in America . She is the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety on the prevention of child sexual abuse. Names were the only thing she changed. Merryn travels the country bearing witness to what happened to her in hopes of encouraging states to enact laws requiring sexual abuse education in schools. Check out Erins third book, An Unimagiable Act. This book describes Erins journey across America to get Erins Law passed and resources for survivors, parents, and educators. Alaska Dispatch: Do you think most lawmakers meaningfully comprehend the issue of sexual abuse? Nightmares. My parents believed me and my cousin Brian confessed to the police, she said. (See Gary Glitter's sex scandal.). Check out pictures, bibliography, and biography of Erin Merryn Child molestation is an epidemic that needs to end now. Merryn didn't tell anyone until she was 13 and she suspected her sister was also being abused. How and when did you do it first? The school, community organization, day care center, etc. Was this just bad luck? We live in a society that doesn't want to even address this issue. Erin has spoken at over 250 CAC events.In 2008 she began writing legislators to require personal body safety be taught to kids in school. Erin Merryn (Author) 139 ratings Kindle Edition $17.99 Read with Our Free App Paperback $16.56 16 Used from $11.22 5 New from $45.35 Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. Erin said he would occasionally downplay what he did, but he never denied it. Then something happened that no one saw coming: he confessed. Do you still stay in contact with him? She now runs Carrot's Instagram and shares pictures of Carrot sharing a similar demeanor of her previously owned cat, Bailey. In 2014 People magazine named her one of fifteen women changing the world along with Oprah and Hillary Clinton. Childhood sexual abuse survivor turned author, speaker, child advocate and activist Erin Merryn is the founder and president of Erin's Law. She is an activist against child sexual abuse as well as the founder of Erin's Law, which requires public schools to teach children personal body safety in order to prevent child sexual abuse. She was afraid she would be a burden to her cousin and that no one would believe her. At no time should the school provide the information directly to the student (unless the student is over 18). These monsters are living in all of our backyards., (Tip: Offender Locator is a great app to have on your smart phone.). My second abuser, my cousin, came from a family of all boys. Erin endured the abuse from age 6 to 8 and from 11 to 13 and felt the long-lasting effects of her guilt, shame and loss of innocence. I remember reading this thinking, they dont teach us that in school. There was one good thing about my sister coming forward, she said. Merryn: What caused me to come forward was unfortunately finding out that my little sister was also being abused. Erin is a mom to three little girls. Carrot has 281,000 instagram followers. Merryn travels the country advocating for children who are victims of sexual assault. Eleven-year-old Erin Merryn's life was transformed on the night she was sexually abused by her cousin, someone she loved and trusted. No one is allowed in the bathroom with you not even your friend. Because so often, people that are being abused do not report it until theyre in their 30s, 40s and 50s cause nobody ever gave them the message onhow tospeak up and tell, Merryn said. How did you find this voice? Is there anything about your life circumstances that you think made you a target? A week later, she got a reply. ", Merryn's family, including her two sisters, moved to another neighborhood in the same town when Merryn was 8, and she stopped seeing Ashley. What's your advice for sexual abuse victims who may want to come forward, but who feel the abuse is better kept secret or forgotten? 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